Out of step – Military jokes and military humor blog

I am drunk, sick, pissed off, stupid, hungry, and have a hangover. Flat-broke, need a haircut, and no mail. I missed an appointment, no sex, no friends, and damn few relatives. I am in debt, have poor character rating, am over time-in-grade, and promotions are all frozen. My day is all fu**ed up and I [...]

The commander’s wife asked her husband at supper at home: “Oh, Peter, darling, how can you look so fresh and relaxed this time of the day, or rather night, after listening to all kinds of troubles and complaints from your many subordinates all day?”
Her husband answered, “Who listens?”