10. Gluing Santa beard to your gas mask
(Private First Class Jason Campbell)
9. Roasting chestnuts with an M4-A3 flamethrower
(Private First Class Rick Pires)
8. Draw up list of who's naughty, who's nice and who can't run their 2 miles
without wheezing like an infant
(Specialist Joy Dobson)
7. Christmas morning, getting to sleep in till 0530
(Sergeant Jennifer Dimas)
6. Want a Playstation 2? Fire Tomahawk missiles at Santa's ass
(Specialist Nicole Lavis)
5. You open a gift and surprise! It's a khaki-colored t-shirt
(Sergeant Ryan Hilton)
4. Extra R&R for any personnel named Donner or Blitzen
(Sergeant Heather O'Harra)
3. There's always plenty of parking at the mall when you're driving a tank
(Specialist Sanjeeb Dodge)
2. Watching "Frosty" and crying my eyes out
(Specialist Terry Barnes)
1. Freeze-dried, shelf-stable, vacuum-sealed eggnog
(Command Sergeant Major William J. Gainey)
From The 'Late Night With David Letterman' Book of Top Ten Lists by David Letterman
See also:
David
Letterman's New Book of Top Ten Lists and Wedding Dress Patterns for the Husky
Bride
An
Altogether New Book of Top Ten Lists by David Letterman